I'm dying

After 2 1/2 months without a period and 3 pregnancy test later my period came.... The depression is hitting me like a ton of bricks to my surprise! I kept saying I wasn't putting my hopes up but a part of me secretly hoped that I was having the same thing that happened with my sons pregnancy happen again where I kept testing negative but I actually was pregnant. We've been trying for 10 months now & nothing. Some might say it's not long enough but for me it's been too long. I'm 34 and I feel like it's not gonna happen again. I don't fucken know. This is just depressing!!! I'm not usually a venter but I'm dying inside!!!