losing virginity

hey so my boyfriend and I (both virgins) want to have sex for the first time but I have no sex drive and when it comes time to try I just lose interest. Like the idea of it to me is..cute..him being excited. But I don't crave sex or sexual intimacy. Just want him to feel good tho! And I don't care if I don't orgasm bc they aren't that great to me I'm a giver not a taker😂 I am afraid of penetration and he's fingered me before but it wasn't anything special and him going deeper with it feels gross and weird🤢only one other boy has and it just wasn't nice feeling. It's not that it hurt or he did it wrong, I just DONT HAVE A SEX DRIVE! When he goes to put it in I tense up and I'm like ooo time for bed gtg. And then he gets sad bc he wanted it and he wants me but I don't think how he thinks or want what he wants. Sex is nothing to me. How in the world can I at least get past my fear of penetration so he can be happy??