SO is very secretive...

I'm writing anonymously because I usually don't share my personal issues. I've just had enough of wondering why everything has been happening. My SO and I have known each other for 14 years and he's always been hard to read and very private with what he does when I'm not around. We have been living together for 2 years and just had a baby. I thought it would change over time but he's ALWAYS on his computer and makes sure he deletes everything in the history. Yes, I've snooped...only because the couple times he forgot to delete everything, I found some things I didn't like. I've always been so open with him and let him know everyone I talk to and what I do througout the day. He lies about watching porn and masturbating, even though during multiple talks, I've let him know I do it too and just wish he would be honest with me. He's lied to me so many times in the past and I don't trust him at all. He also wants to do his own thing way too much and loves being out on Fridays and some Saturdays, leaving me at the house with the kids instead of us doing family things on his only 2 days off. And, when he's home...it's all about game time or watching Netflix. This is more of a rant than anything, but I'm in love with a man that doesn't seem to feel the same, or even want to be around me. I want so bad for us to work, but I don't want to feel this way about the person I'm with for the rest of my life. :/