Nothing could have prepared me for the emotional rollercoaster of my journey while trying to conceive.

After 10 months of trying, prefaced by years of wanting, I finally saw that beautiful pink line on a pregnancy test. Tears of joy, tears of hope, tears of gratitude! I finally felt like all the months of waiting, wondering, and tears were worth it. I thought that the trying was my struggle and I could finally put it in the past. I felt relief - my body could do it! I felt overwhelming joy at the knowledge that there was a little life growing in me.

Until there suddenly wasn't.

At 5 weeks, 6 days I began to spot and then it slowly progressed to deep red bleeding. I felt my blood freeze in my veins and terror grip my heart. I pleaded with God - please don't take my baby. But He ultimately called my little one to His arms and there was nothing I could do but surrender to His will. And when I did I felt an unexplainable peace in the midst of pain.

Navigating the loss has left me with a strange mix of healing and emotional scar tissue. Nothing in my life has felt as isolating as this experience, but I also feel bonded with all the other women who are quietly living out their own losses.

I'm eager to try again, yet terrified of going through another miscarriage. What helped you? How did you try again and navigate the emotional triggers?