I can believe this is so sad

So I feel mad now but at the same time I can pushing him to do a baby in his bday so base in glow today was my ovulation sept 23 but for the fews days I was cramping hard so I did a ovulation test and was negative nothing show up , but in the pass days I did it too was positive so we being having sex for the pass two weekend without missing a day , we have sex yesterday and we are using presee too , today was his bday friend family in home he promised me that he will not drink and he did it now he fall sleep like always he do with alcohol and not sex tonight so I'm like ok whatever i promise lady's I'm doing this for him I already have a boy and girl with my ex relationship he want a baby with me I'm trying hard with him so if this month not happened I will stop taking vitamins pressed giving him vitamins and also checking glow for my fértil days I give up . He always drink and fall sleep 😴 wtf