the dreaded visitor is on her way

been TTC for only 5 months but I've waited 10 years for my husband and I to get on the same page so it feels like longer. He fears it's him. I fear it's me. doc says I'm being impatient. bff says to not stress about it. I don't want my mom to know we're trying but I'm sure she has an idea. I just want to call her and cry about it but I also want our announcement to be a surprise to her. I'm afraid if it takes to long to conceive my husband will change his mind. So I try to not bring it up very often. I hide my negative tests. I hide my emotions. I'm losing faith as I feel AF knocking at my door for the 5th time. I'm just lost and confused.