so my best friend and i (h) we both came out to each other back in june, when i realized i was developing a crush on her in april. im depressed and that same day i told her all those issues along with my self harm. in august- september my sister asked if we were dating, i said no and told h that so it turned into a “joke”. we’d call each other babe and do cute thing. then i hung out with her and we cuddled all day and two weeks later same thing but this time i kissed her on the cheek and we were physically closer. after that she stopped the “joke”, calls other girls cute, doesn’t act the same way towards me, and has done other multiple things that show she doesn’t love me like that. i haven’t told her i’m in love but it’s pretty clear and i’ve asked her why she changed but she says she doesn’t notice it. i just really can’t handle being in love with her when i’m depressed and she’s the only thing keeping me alive which i know isn’t healthy but i love everything about her. we still say that we love each other every day and she knows i don’t believe her but she still says it’s true... i see her saturday so hopefully something will change. i just needed to rant , thanks if you read💙