You have played me for the last time...I’m done F***ing with you :)

JB • And now I do what’s BEST for me.......

Two months ago I found out my husband was having an emotional affair with someone I truly trusted. Someone I felt sorry for because of the shitty cards she had been dealt in life. Someone I always kept in my prayers at night. You see she is the mother to two kids with Batten Disease. First you lose your sight, then your speech, and the chances of you living past 18 are low. My youngest and her son have been school friends since Kindergarten. Never hanging out with each other outside of school events and birthday parties because her kids need 24/hr care. With all the doctor visits they have to attend it’s hard to make “play dates.” One day this summer my husband decided to take our youngest to the park to play. While there they happened to run into this school friend and his mom. Phone numbers were exchanged. School friend mom told my husband how her son D(what we will call him during this post) never has kids who want to play with him outside of school. Husband told her any time they wanted to meet up for “play dates” to text and he will bring our youngest K (what we will call him). Well, those “play dates” were happening 6 times a week. A text here and there turned into all day long. Started getting a feeling something was going on and told my husband about my concerns. He denied anything was going on but yet he was very secretive about his phone. Then two weeks before school started K came up to me. He said, “mom if I tell you something you promise not to get mad?” (Me) “Promise. You can tell me anything K.” (K) “You need to watch D’s mom around dad.” That was all I needed to start finding out exactly what was going on.

So one day I watched my husband unlock his phone (without him noticing) so I could get his password. Waited until he fell asleep. Programmed his texts to be backed up to my iPad. Imagine my surprise when I discovered the context of their texts. Her sending him flirty memes. Talking about how he makes her smile and asking if he is smiling cause of her. Making arrangements to meet up for play dates, lunch dates at Chili, talking about how broken her marriage is, and asking what he wanted her to bring to eat during his lunch break. Her daughter is having a seizure but instead of texting her husband she is texting mine. My world came crashing down. Felt like the rug was pulled right out from under me. For days I was so depressed. Couldn’t eat, sleep, and most days didn’t want to function in life. I was still madly in love with my husband. Thought of not being with him scared me. One morning my oldest gave me a hug. Not unusual for him. Always gives me hugs just for no reason. It was what he said while hugging me that woke me up. He said, “I don’t know why you have been so down lately but I miss the smile on your face every morning.” I may have been 100% broken but I refused to let my kids see my break anymore. Then I got angry, discovered a <a href="https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.glow.android.eve">Eve</a> post, and decided I was going to have the last laugh.

He had no clue while he laid next to me in bed sleeping I was reading their texts. Those “play dates” I showed up to unannounced were to make her sweat. Kissing and touching on my husband in front of her was to get her wild up.

Yesterday said enough was enough. I packed up my stuff. Message her husband all their texts and filled him in. Let him know how she has been using their son. Told hubby he was BUSTED. He was angry. Told me he didn’t think his texts needed to be check like a 6yr old. Confessed everything. Explained nothing sexual went on and it didn’t start off flirting. It just happened. He was attracted to her personality. How easy it was to talk to her with them both having anxiety. It was 50/50 fault and how we can be adults about everything. I can be civil(HA). He got married so fast and so young. He was drawn to my looks never my personality!! We don’t have a lot in common.

Word must have gotten around fast .Text from her this morning read “I know I deserve consequences, but I am asking for mercy. I messed up. I'm still sorry. I still ask for forgiveness. I am working on being loved by a God who gives second chances. I'm sorry. I hate myself for it all. I hate the hurt. I hate that I wasn't stronger. I hate that I made you feel the way you do. I'm a disgusting excuse for a human being. I deserve death. The only reason I haven't is because my kids are dying and they need me.

I will never be able to convince you how sorry I still am. I have been getting random messages from strangers talking about details of what went on. So I am asking for your mercy.”

Personally I’m a good woman. Not perfect by any means. Our marriage wasn’t perfect but I’ve always been faithful. Stupid to think surviving military life and deployments meant we were unbreakable. Fucked up part in this is I have to see this woman ever time I pick up my kid at school or attend my child’s field trip. Always going to be reminded of the betrayal. Pissed off over how they used our kids. They have both lost a friend and they were the innocent ones in this. They didn’t asked to be used. Husband can enjoy sleeping alone and not waking up to our kids. She is not even a upgrade. Only thing she has going for her is great hair😂. Plus in my state I get half of EVERYTHING 😆 #sorrynotsorry #godwillforgiveme #FinallyFREE