I posted last week about low hcg levels and how my doctor hasn't been able to find anything on the ultrasound, no sac, no baby.

Well, after this post I had some very light spotting over the weekend, and called my doctor on Monday who told me to come in immediately. He did another tv ultrasound and saw something, but couldn't say if it's a blood clot or a sac. I did another blood test that day (2,727) and then one more on Wednesday (4,713). At the ultrasound on Thursday (7 weeks pregnant) he saw 2 sacs, he said it's either that the one I had is falling apart or there would have been twins, BUT both of them are empty and he is 99% sure this isn't a viable pregnancy because my hcg levels are still very low and he should be able to see the baby by now. He gave me 3 choices:

1, wait two weeks and see what happens 

2, do a D&C

3, take medication when I'm ready (I don't remember the name) and induce miscarriage at home

I was totally overwhelmed with everything and said I chose 3, because I couldn't stand feeling like this anymore and I trust his opinion, and I wanted to have the privacy of my home.

Well, that night I was so sad and had a few glasses of wine and when I tried to go to sleep I started thinking but what if.... I felt horrible for drinking and since that moment I keep on thinking maybe I should just wait, maybe there is still a chance.... I haven't even gone to the pharmacy to pick up the pills. But at the same time I'm thinking if this isn't going to turn out well anyways, why keep grasping at straws, just do it so you can try again next month.

What did/would you do? Should I just accept what it is, take the pills, and move on? Has anyone a positive story to share? I haven't told anyone but my husband, and he just doesn't understand my feelings, for him it's over and he thinks even if there would be a baby/babies, it would be better not to have it/them because I probably harmed it/them by drinking that night...

UPDATE: started heavy bleeding today, bright and dark red with clots, but no pain so far. I guess the decision was made for me... 

Gave my 7 month old lots of extra cuddles today and hope the bleeding doesn't last too long because I know hubby needs some extra cuddles too (and I'm ready to try again!) 😉