Hate this whole shit

Well hi I'm a teen and I still can't seem to move on from my last relationship. We were together for one year and a little more and it's been hard at times. I've had other boyfriends but this one was the only guy I felt something so strong for, he made me feel amazing and I still love him. The thing is that he literally stepped all over me, he did the worst thing ever which was cheat and so much other shit that I have also posted in the past weeks. I was still there answering his texts because I still care. I stopped answering because it wasn't healthy but I wish I could still be there for him and talk to him again, I miss him and he doesn't deserve it and I really I don't get why I'm still so stuck when he did the worst to me, he's not a good person at all and he's caused me so much hurt, my self confidence was destroyed and it's getting back little by little. It just sucks how I still wish we'd get back when he's caused me so much hurt, I want to move on and there's days where I'm okay but others I'm not. I just want to be able to forget😩