Husband wants space

I posted yesterday about the stupid thing I did (snoop) and now my husband, understandably, wants space. He has never been very transparent but always told me I was welcome to look at his phone.

Anyway, I really want to respect his need for space but I'm obviously anxious attachment style, so it has me teetering on anxiety. Since the beginning of our marriage (only 10 months in), we've fought so much over things that started with an insecure question or comment on my part exploded by his frustration, hurt, and intolerance. He can get really mean and dismissive and never seems to focus on solution. I try to own my part of the issue, apologize, and hear him out (even when he's being a total dick).

I don't subscribe to the idea that marriage can or should be easily tossed aside. However, as I'm emotionally processing the space he's asked for. At first, I felt this "omg he might leave me" feeling in its extremity. Now, I'm reflecting on what an ass he's been during any and all conflict, blaming me, expressing contempt, stonewalling, and refusing to take ownership. He refuses to try counseling, but I've been going on my own for months. I have a daughter (8yo) in the mix from a prior marriage (ended be of his alcohol issues becoming dangerous) so I'm not interested in playing games with our commitment to each other. I'm starting to feel resentful and angry instead of worried. I'm starting to feel like maybe he's right that we shouldn't be together. I don't want to talk myself off the ledge of my beliefs about doing everything possible to take care of the marriage. Advice? Thoughts? Help?

Please be gentle with your advice. My heart is aching in this confusion.