Genital hsv1 and disclosure


Hi everyone!

Ok, this is going to be a long post, but here goes.

On September 24th I met up with this guy, we had protected vaginal sex, but unprotected oral. A few days later, I feel like crap and urination was difficult because it stung. I go to the obgyn and she finds a lesion on my vulva, and she swabs it and runs blood work and writes me a script for acyclovir. I feel better but she didn't even catch the uti I had!!! I go home over the weekend(I'm away for college) and I visit an urgent care so they can check out my lesion and treat my uti. The doc was way more informative than my obgyn. Fast forward and I get my results back a week later and she says everything is negative, but the swab shows "exposure to cold sores."

I ask for clarification, and once again the doc doesn't know wtf she's talking about. So I'm just gonna assume I have it.

Meanwhile, before and while all this was going on I had an active dating profile up and I've started talking to this guy. We haven't had sex yet, I'm kind of put off on the idea because I've only been with three guys and BAM! I got a damn std I have to deal with for the rest of my life.

I looked up some info on ghsv1 and it states that the transmission rate is realllly low. Like less than .04% if on meds. The transmission rate is even higher for people with oral hsv1

Is there a need to disclose?

I feel like it's unfair that people who have hsv1 orally don't have to disclose ( the guy that gave it to me didnt disclose that he has cold sores in the past until AFTER I asked him when I was having symptoms)

I feel so dumb, I thought I was educated enough when it came to sex, like before I fucked him I made sure I looked for bumps/sores on his face and dick and I didn't see any so I thought I was good.

Sorry for the rant.

But I'm so upset. I feel like my love life is over. I don't know when I'm gonna tell the guy I'm talking to now about my situation (definitely before sex though). I don't even know if I want to have sex right now.

Can you guys give me some tips on how to disclose? I don't wanna be like"HEY I HAVE HERPES, DTF?" That'll make him run for sure lol

Thanks for reading.