It wasn't entirely your fault. I'm partly to blame. But why didn't you stop me? Why didn't you make me see that pictures of another naked wasn't the only way to know someone. To see someone else's soul.

I've been through hell. And I was crawling my way back. And now it feels like my progress was all for not because you kicked me back into the devil's pit.

You just wanted a picture of a body. Not my soul. Not my heart. Not my mind. You pretended you did. Which makes you worse.

Giving false hope to an eager being who wants to not feel so alone in the world.

Making it seem like she had a voice to be heard. And her words meant something.

You just wanted a picture.

And one turned in to multiple.

But you should have told me you had a girlfriend. And I was just some picture. Some moving, speaking picture with life still a little bit in her. Then you took the rest of her breathe. And she started to drown.

I was just a picture to you.

Now I'm swimming. Swimming in an ocean of regret. Swimming because I was drowning and now trying to save myself. Swimming because I need to not swim anymore and find shore to rest from all of the hateful things I think about myself.

And you should have known. I was a force to reckon with. Because at this moment I am the ocean. We are one. And the ocean can make waves come crashing down. And can make ships crash and sink. And sailors drown.

It's a good thing you're far away.

Sincerely,

The picture of a girl

Who became a force of nature