It's been a really hard year for us. We were engaged and called it off because everything was too much. He's heading back to school after a semester off in a couple days. I moved back to my hometown after us living together for a year. He was supposed to stay 4 hours away to help his family but showed up here after a week of me being gone. He's been living with his brother only a couple miles away. It's been amazing because things have been how they were when we were in our first couple years of dating. We've had so much fun and he's been so much more intimate. We were both dealing with depression last year so while our sex life was good it wasn't passionate or filled with love like it has been again. Idk when I'm going to see him again because our schedules conflict and it hurts so bad. He hasn't left yet but I already miss him more than ever. We have one more night together possibly tonight or tomorrow but all I'm sitting here wishing for at Christmas is that he could stay for a little longer. Our families don't know we have still been seeing seeing each other since the move. I've never loved someone so much and my heart hurts so so bad right now. I've got a doctors appointment today because I've been bleeding on and off for two weeks with massive chunks of lining coming out. I've been scared but haven't told him because I know he will stay longer and I can't risk him missing the semester. I've miscarried once before not long before we met so I'm hoping that's not what this is because I don't want to loose him from that. He just started talking about having kids one day and idk if I can (PCOS). I feel the depression creeping back in for me and see the light fading in his eyes as school beats him down. I'm scared I'm loosing him in more ways than one. I'm just venting at this point and idk if any of this makes sense. If it does any advice to lift spirits and make it a little easier would be great.