a little lonely for Christmas

I’m not gonna lie, this is a meh holiday. And I already feel like shit for it because I live with my family and I just feel like I’m being ungrateful. It’s not that I don’t love my family, not at all. It’s just that I thought I would be spending this Christmas with a family of my own by now. To be fair I didn’t have any reason to believe that, I haven’t even been in a relationship for six years, and I haven’t been able to keep anyone’s attention longer than like three days, but it’s still painful. And the worst part is talking to anyone who’s supposed to be close to me actually just patronizes me. But that’s my own fault too. Its just at some point the advice doesn’t work anymore, you know? Going out alone and dating yourself is great, but it’s like how long do I have to do EVERYTHING alone? And I’ll have to stay off social media today. It’s the first time everyone’s sent me a ‘merry Christmas’ snap with a plus one 🙃