Do you feel grief or disappointment for not having twins?

Question

I feel happy for this pregnancy, but I somehow felt really sad when I saw only one little bean at my first ultrasound... I didn't realize how much I wanted twins until I realized they weren't there. Is this normal? Am I a bad mother for wanting more than one baby? Will this grief go away after I give birth and finally meet the baby?

Answer

It’s probably the same feeling people get when they really wanted a girl and end up with a boy - you had an image of what your ideal situation was and you’re sad that it isn’t going to be realized. Once he or she is born you’ll be so consumed you won’t be able to even imagine two!! That being said, I’m sincerely sorry you didn’t get what you wanted!

Answer

If you wanted more, the disappointment is understandable. There seems to be a lot of twins posted lately. I like the idea of twins, but I know I couldn’t handle it in actuality.

Answer

I did, yes, but my last baby is a rainbow baby after actually losing both my twins. So yes, I was devastated. But he’s my everything. You’ll fall into place, don’t fret!

Answer

I think this is really strange given it was your first ultrasound... so therefore there was no reason why you would expect to see two little ‘beans’ as you say. If you were expecting twins and then one of them died... then i’d understand this post but you just wanted to see two little beans, I get the whole ‘wanting’ twins thing, all I ever wanted was boy/girl twins UNBELIEVABLY my wish came true but that was pure luck, now I have twins I think it must be so hard being a twin, having to SHARE your mums attention always, like they never ever ever just get their mums undivided attention, never!! I think us ‘singletons’ take this for granted as children.

Do you feel grief or disappointment for not having twins?

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