Advice??

So my MIL and my hubbys whole side of the family is very strange. My MIL always calls my husband 2-3 times a day to see what he’s doing. She invites us over to her house Friday Saturday and Sunday’s and it feels like I have to fight her to spend time with my husband. they work together and she insists on cooking his lunch for him. If I say no he gets mad. I can never go against his mom ever, in his eyes she is an angel (she’s not, she’s cheating on her husband and has said terrible things to me about my husband too) he knows about the cheating but not about the things she’s told me about him. I don’t think I will ever tell him what she said about him. But anyway he would do anything for her which I understand as that’s his mom and no matter what he’s gonna love her but he never puts me first. If she says we’re doing it this way and I say no he sides with her. He never gives me my place when it comes to her or anyone in his family. I am always pushed aside and made to feel like bc we don’t have kids together yet I’m not part of the family. I don’t know what to do to make him see that the relationship with his mom is unhealthy or for her and his stepdad to just back off a little bit and let us breath and be alone. We’ve not even been married a year we want alone time!! If I say no to going out to eat with them for the 3rd time in a week he gets mad but if I even ask to see my family once he acts like it’s a huge chore. Anytime we fight he gets in the car and drives to his moms house. I am lost as to what to do. I need him to start putting me first?? She will Snapchat him all day long non stop! Ladies please tell me I’m not exaggerating or making a big deal.. tell me nobody else would be ok with your husband putting his mother over you?

And might I add that she has a 13 year old boy who is on drugs and never home yet she never has a clue where he’s at but she always has to keep tabs on my husband. She did a terrible job raising her kids. And guilt trips my husband to feel bad for her so he’ll do anything she says.