how do you do It?

I carried my first baby perfectly healthy to term and had a wonderful experience. my husband and I decided we wanted to try for another and it happened fairly quickly but a couple weeks after the good news, came all of our worst nightmares... I started bleeding and then came the rushing to the hospital and hcg testing to find out I was miscarrying. It was devastating but, we decided to keep trying and only 3 months later, we were pregnant again! this time I was so nervous every time i wiped, horrified I was going to see blood again. Only 5 days after my first faint positive, I lost the baby again. it's been 3 months again and I'm in my Tww, but I'm just so terrified of losing another baby. it's been so hard on us both. I just don't know how you amazing ladies do it. how you keep up the hope. I feel like next time I am pregnant I'm going to want to not lift a finger just in case it's my fault this keeps happening. I don't know what I'm doing wrong this time... you all are my hero's who pick yourselves up and trust that your rainbow babies will be healthy. ❤💛💚💙💜 sorry for my rant.