advice on quitting smoking..be gentle

I need advice on quitting smoking. I picked up my first cigarette my senior year of high school the night my dad passed away and i havent quit since. I'm up to a pack and a half a day now and I'm 21. It's especially bad when I'm stressed out or when I'm with friends, they dont smoke a lot but just hanging out and having a good time it's like second nature to me. I want to quit but I don't know where to begin 😣 ive heard of the patches and the gums, but some say it doesnt help. do any former smokers have any advice?