Someone please help me out

Someone please help me out. I’m 36, never been pregnant, freaking out, only person I have in my life that cares is my mom. Boyfriend not a bad guy, haven’t been dating that long, if you ask me his priorities are backwards. He gets shitfaced drunk on the weekends because “he’s worked all week and deserves it”. He’s not the Prince Charming I’ve always wanted and I’ve heard stories that he’s abusive. I don’t want to tell him now (if ever). Any advice will do. Don’t know what else to write. Ask me questions if you want... I’m just scared