Is it okay/ normal to still feel deeply hurt a year after being cheated on ? Still together.

Question

Leaving is not an option for a reason .  I don't want to get into detail,  but just wondering if it's normal to still be feeling this way so long after . has anyone else felt this way, did it get better ? Does anything make it better or make you forget? The thoughts of it all just always seem to creep up on me.  I feel like it truly changed a part of me .

Answer

3 years later and every February the hurt is fresh.  It is getting better though.  I love my husband more than anything and I know he loves me.  It was very rough for probably the whole first year. My therapist recently said something that really set me free though.  This is not my burden to carry,  it's his.  Forgive but don't forget and move on.  Stop holding on to the responsibility of what he did.  HE made the choice not you.

Answer

If leaving isn’t an option for you I HIGHLY recommend therapy. You need to talk through it and find closure.

Answer

It is normal. But if you still feel weird and act odd about it I'd go to therapy or leave him for sure. I'm going the exact same thing. And I still haven't done anything so I'm not too much of one to talk.

Answer

Try therapy as a couple.

Answer

I’ve been cheated on a lot in the past with other relationships and I usually get over it by 6-9 months. By a year I barely think about it. But everyone is so different and every case is so different. I would seek counseling if you’re still troubled by it. It would help you.

Answer

I think if you’re not leaving him is because you have good reasons to do that, so that being said, you need to find a way to forgive him for good. Maybe try going to the psychologist? They can give you the tools you need to get over this issue.
Of course cheating is bad and I can imagine you’re disappointed but I think that most of the anger comes from the shame of being cheated on... like if we weren’t enough.
I personally think that one can make a mistake and be sincerely regretful. Not justifying cheaters, but maybe he indeed made a mistake and didn’t think about the consequences.

Answer

Get over it or leave him. You’re only making yourself miserable. Well maybe him too with your words or actions.

Answer

you have to go to therapy, and both of you. you holding onto things isnt healthy. if you choose him you have to let go of the past or you will both never be happy.

Answer

Well I definitely would not be still together with someone after they cheated on me because all trust in that relationship would be gone

Answer

Leaving is ALWAYS an option. Why would you waste your own time and someone else’s with a person you’re not happy with?

Is it okay/ normal to still feel deeply hurt a year after being cheated on ? Still together.

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