Should I be friends with her?

Question

So I’ve had a best friend since 2008. She was my VERY bestfriend.. we did everything together. Around 2013 we had a “wild” night... she gave me oral.. THAT WAS IT!!  After that I got in to a relationship with my (now) fiancé and I felt comfortable enough to tell him about my crazy. Now, he doesn’t want me to be friends with her. The situation we had, would NEVER happen again, and I miss my old bestfriends friendship. I’ve had a daughter since then and I so badly want her to be apart of my life again. She’s asked me to meet up to meet my daughter and catch up. Am I wrong for wanting the friendship back ?

Answer

The best thing to do is gain perspective - would you be okay with him being best friends with a guy he had oral sex with previously? I’m not sure I’d be comfortable with it. Maybe you should suggest the three of you hanging out all together so your fiancé can see there’s nothing between you anymore? He may just feel insecure about it and need more reassurance than you just saying it won’t happen again. He may even feel like if you’ve been intimate with a woman, that’s not something he can give you, so he may be somewhat intimidated. Open communication and honesty will be your best friends in this situation 😊 good luck!

Answer

Look at it this way, just because you’re both females doesn’t mean you don’t have a sexual past with her, even if it was just one night. 
If you asked your husband who had a one night sexual encounter to not talk to that person again and he turned around and did, how would you feel? 
Communicate with him first, before hanging out with her. If enough time has passed and he’s okay with it, then great. If not, you’ll need to decide if your relationship or friendship is more important to you.

Answer

It doesn’t really matter whether or not we think your husband is “right” or “wrong”. He clearly feels some type of way about it and I don’t think its your or our jobs to determine whether or not those feelings are valid. How would you feel if you were in his position?

Answer

it re a honestly depends on the dynamics of your relationship, but this would absolutely not be a problem in my relationship. I'm fact, it hasn't been yet lol.

Should I be friends with her?

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