Why would a Father do this???!!!!WTF

Question

Sorry its soooo long...It's too many details but I'm going to try to sum it up. I have 2 children by this man, 7yr old girl and 3yr old boy. We now live in different states. He has always been an inconsistent and unreliable father and comes around when he wants and takes care of them when he feels like it. 2 yrs ago I decided to finally take him to court and he then started getting the kids during summer and holiday breaks.

So after my kids returned from thanksgiving break last yr my daughter told me he older half brother who is 9, had touched her with his hands in her vagina multiple times even though she asked him not to. She was scared to death and embarrassed bc she knows no one is suppose to see or touch her in her private areas. She was also very confused bc she said it hurt a little but in a way it felt good too, she was even more embarrassed about that part. She was scared to tell her father and her brother begged her not to, keep in mind she was 6 at this time so she was very confused and shut down.Needless to say I took her to the doctor immediately, they reported it to authorities and she has been in counseling since which has helped her sooooo much. She felt a lot of guilt bc she didn't want to get her brother in trouble bc she loves him but she didn't understand why he would do that to her.

She has not seen or had contact with this brother bc the doctor and authorities advised against it, I wouldn't allow it anyway, and she has no interest in being around him. But her Stupid father doesn't seem to get that.

First he responded horribly by shutting her out and being more concerned with protecting his son and not at all concerned with how she was affected by the incident. He just acted as if nothing happened!! Now months later he keeps pressuring her to speak to her brother and says he doesn't want this to stop them from knowing each other and having a relationship. He even text her behind my back telling her she should go to his house so she can play and talk with her brother! WTF is wrong with him? I know he is a kid too and the authorities, doctor, and myself all recommend he get the boy some counseling but they have done nothing! I feel that's unfortunate but not my problem, my concern is my kids and I don't feel he should be pressuring her to see or speak to her brother at all. Am I wrong? Is there something I'm missing that makes what he is doing understandable? Bc I don't get it!!!

Answer

Follow your instincts. I'd also go back to court so that your kids don't have to go back to that house. I mean doesn't sound like the dad can be trusted to protect his daughter from his son. Hell, he doesn't even recognize it as a problem which really would be concerning for me. Maybe the son picked that shit up from the dad.

Answer

No it absolutely right to feel the way u feel.. If u don't protect her who will.. Wat if the touching would of been worse.. Maybe u should
Let the athorities know he is trying to force her to talk to him.. And he is an ass for not understanding that he needs to know what his son did was wrong he is suppose to protect his little girl regardless even if it's from his own child.. I am soo sorry that happen to ur baby girl..

Answer

No you're doing what ANY good/loving mother would do. Follow your heart and what you feel is best. If she doesn't want to see him and you don't want her there either. Then forbid it!

Answer

Do all within your power to keep this man and the perverted kin away from children.

Answer

Keep her away from him. You're doing the right thing.

I would also consider taking her phone away if your ex is going to continue to undermine you. Can you get a restraining order? I'm thinking next time he looks after your daughter he might bring the older half brother anyway without your knowledge, in that case you need to be able to take steps against him

Answer

How is he texting a 6/7 year old behind your back?

Answer

No. Keep her away from him. He is probably letting him do it. Seen as how he has no care to teach his child better than that. Also, he couldve been doing it to the boy. And yea. People are sick. Be very careful with that situation.

Answer

I'm so sorry for your little girl. Unfortunately, I'm hearing more of these incidents every day and not just with family members. 9 times out of 10, the child molesting another child is also being molested. Your child should NOT have any contact with her abuser.

Answer

I would absolutely not bend from the decisions you have made concerning your daughter. Good job for protecting her from further abuse.  Her dad is an idiot and a poor excuse for a father for not wanting to protect his daughter and not helping his son get the therapy and help he quite obviously needs. I would take that dirtbag back to court, document all conversations between father and daughter and revoke all rights from him where your daughter is concerned. He does not have her best interests in mind when he is constantly trying to push an issue where she is clearly not safe. I hope things work out in your favor. Good luck!

Answer

Find out if you can file for some type of protection order on behalf of your daughter. Find out if you can file to have dad blocked from contacting her since he refuses to get the abuser counseling or help and he wants to allow unsupervised contact of your daughter with the abuser who resides in his home. I'm floored that your sperm donor doesn't care. If I were you, I'd speak to an attorney. Find out if you can sue the dad to make him get counseling for that boy and ask that dad pay for all the counseling for your daughter. While the other boy is n't your responsibility, he'll most likely do it again to someone else's son or daughter. I'm so sorry for your daughter. No one should have that forced on them. Thank goodness you are there for her and she felt  comfortable enough to tell you what happened.

Why would a Father do this???!!!!WTF

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