Bare w me— I’m venting and this was my evening just now...

My last 3 months have been constant fatigue and nausea, can’t eat much.. Finally getting some energy back we went out for a bday party.. come home to my dog shitting everywhere. My husband can’t stand to see or smell or touch shit or any yuck bodily fluid.. so I’m left to clean.. no problem.. Its time to team up and adult.. I was happy we left when we did cuz I was starting to feel weak and uncomfortable. So he washes and dries puppy while I scrub on hands and knees dried poo all over kitchen floor and mop section where crate/gate goes, wipe down and sanitize the poo chunked crate that she jumped over, (at this time I hear him done and he starts to pull out his gun and play w it, comes downstairs puts puppy in her crate lays on couch and plays w gun) I ask him to help me finish since he’s finished, like help move chairs so I can move center island to mop rest of kitchen, and spray off towels, ( states how dare i ask cuz his back hurts, he moves chairs after 5 min of me asking him, lays back on couch.), I finish scrubbing and mopping rest of kitchen, started the laundry, go outside spray down the poo chunked blankets while it’s raining.. not complaining about my discomfort or fatigue mind you. So he decided —how dare I get mad at him for not helping cuz his back hurts.. how I’m never gonna get it. How he doesn’t know why he’s married to me. Says he’s miserable .. so much for me making food for him.. cuz you know I’m still cleaning... finally finished I go to wake him up off the couch and tell him time to go upstairs... bad back.. wakes up and says so much for eating food... ugh.. fuck that.. left him there..

Ugh... wtf is he going to do w a child that gets sick.. especially if I’m sick too and can’t do everything to care of baby.. a puking, pooping child that won’t stop.. blowouts... snot.... he’s constantly going to use his back as an excuse... and will constantly turn shit around on me and make it my fault..

What am I suppose to do w a man that doesn’t want to be a father except for when it’s fun.. i don’t feel like I can rely on my husband to be there for me as a team player.. I feel like I’m in too deep... I feel like wtf did I just do..