Finally..

To everyone on eve I just feel like I should share something I recently had to go through & I had no idea I even had it going on until someone pointed it out. If you wish to leave please do. On with the story..

so I’m 15. I’m actually very mature for my age. I hated this guy for years. Like I actually hated him so much and I remember just always being a bitch to him 25/8. Then one day, he posts on his snapchat he’s moving. So I message him saying how I wish I didn’t hate him & I wanted to make things right before he left. We continued to talk and I was enjoying it. I started gaining feelings for him throughout the time we were talking so I tell him. Turns out it was a joke on his story. I was very relieved he really wasn’t leaving. Fast forward to when we start dating. I didn’t want to fall for him fast, I wanted to take things slowly. I wanted it to be real. I wanted him & all of his flaws.

He says the right things, melts my heart. Makes me wonder where he’s been and why I have never tried to even talk to him. A few weeks into being together I get told that he was talking to TWO other girls while me and him were talking but he “cut” them off for me & yet silly me, I don’t mind because he chose me. I start getting harassed by these girls and I’m in a lot of extracurricular activities and I would get kicked out for violence so I just get my classes switched & ignore them. A week into getting my classes changed he starts going through stuff saying he doesn’t want to be around me all the time and is just always mad at me

I don’t know why he’s always mad at me but he always was & I just begged him to not leave. I cried so many times because I couldn’t bare him leaving me. Things started getting more mentally abusive than a relationship & I’m scared of everything I say. I try not to say certain things so he can get angry at me. I hold my tongue & let things go. He walks me to my favorite class & tells me he’s breaking up w me for the time being due to not having time for me. I cry and pretend I’m okay. I go to my class & im a mess but that’s okay. Anyway I try and keep us talking so I wouldn’t lose him.

I get told he has been talking to those two girls about me. About how “I’m so annoying” “ & “im so in love with him”

I mean if you were bragging that’s amazing but to just make fun of me?

I start screaming & crying and I start hitting lockers to hurt myself. I break down in the middle of the hallway because of him.

I don’t go to my classes with him for a few days because of that.

He texts me and says “he feels bad for me because I’m down for him and all he wants is pussy.”

He literally tells me one day, I kinda just want to hoe around & not be tied down but I also want someone down for me & ties down. You cannot chose between pussy & someone who loved you.

It breaks my heart.

I pretend I’m okay but weeks pass and I start becoming someone I once hated. I was so negative & disrespectful. I hated who I became but I couldn’t stop.

I thought to myself, “ why would anyone want to be with me if I can’t even give up what everyone wants these days” I’m a Virgin & he didn’t want to wait until I was ready you see.

So I tell him, “ if it’s that serious I will skip rehearsal and fuck you” it’s what he wanted so badly but he turned me down because he sees how he’s acting but he continues to act like a sexy asshole ( he’s not that sexy) ( I liked his personality) that is before he became mentally abusive.

A month and a few weeks later, I’m able to finally attend the classes I have with him & gradually continuing to try and be happy. Baby steps they say. I’m honestly trying but still. Sometimes I look at him and I remember how he was before he became who he did at the end of our relationship. It sickens me how I did this.

I’m one of those girls who ignores everyone & hides everything. Only a select few of people actually know me. But I did & im still heart broken.

Moral of the story, don’t trust his words until your 100% sure he won’t do this. Trust issues aren’t bad to have unless they’re w your w the best guy or girl you can be. Please don’t go through what I did. I wish the best of all of you.♥️