In need of an uplift

I’m having an awful day, I’m 18 and was diagnosed with PCOS a little over 2 weeks ago.

I’ve always been the type of girl to love children, I’ve always planned for children. I enjoy the idea of being around children so much that I have decided to train as a teacher.

Now I understand that you can have children still but seeing how large the cysts were on the ultrasound, really put things in perspective for me. It’s left an empty hole in my heart. My aunt had PCOS and tried for years and was never able to have children.

Recently, 2 of my close friends have become pregnant, I am so happy for them and they are wanting me to be beside them every step of the way. However, tonight, my cousin announced she was expecting. I’m so pleased for her, she’s found an amazing boyfriend and has just moved in to a lovely cottage with him. But I can’t help but feel so depressed.

I’m too young to be worrying about having children but I feel that I have to, because it’s going to be a struggle. I’m on metaformin and on average my cycle is 100+ days long. I just want someone to hug me and say it will be okay.

Unfortunately my grandad and brother are both going through chemotherapy at the moment so the docs has been on taking care of them, so my own family haven’t had time to take in my diagnosis and ask me if I’m okay.

Ever since I was a child I have wanted a huge family but now it seems so distant😞