junk food or baby?

I Have wanted a kid since I was like 11, I want it with every ounce of my being. I have pcos so first let down. And I am 5'10 and about 190 which does not help anything. I know I need to lose weight to get pregnant and I just can't I don't know what's wrong with me. I would literally do anything to be a mom and I have something that could help to achieve that. Weight loss does not guarantee pregnancy but it is a step further than I'm at now but it's just so fucking hard. And I feel like a failure. I need motivation and you would think a baby should be my motivation but I'm still fat and not pregnant.