I'm pretty sure I'm a toxic person by nature. The kind that people warn against when looking for a partner. But, I don't act on it if that makes sense. By that I mean that I want to have some control over who my boyfriend is friends with, get jealous easily, want to bring up past mistakes against him, and get upset when he doesn't reply to me soon. I never say anything about these feelings though but not expressing them of course means he behaves the same way and it keeps tearing away at me. As far as I can tell he doesn't know I think and feel these things, but how do I make myself stop thinking and feeling them? I know it's wrong of me to want him to cut his ex out of his life, to want to start a fight over this thing I claimed I forgave him for, and others, so how do I make myself stop feeling like I want to do these things? I don't want to be that girl and I'm doing my best to make it seem like I'm not but I get so incredibly upset by these things. I could really use some advice and kind words. Thank you.