Advice needed

I was asked to be in a wedding later this year. My baby will still be a newborn, the wedding is over 2 hours from home and we would need to get a hotel. I am a FTM and am not comfortable bringing my baby so far from home and overnight. I let the bride know but she is telling me it’s my fault, I’m not there for her, I don’t have time for her life, etc. I almost feel like she is bullying me. I told her I will still try my best to make it as a guest to the wedding. I wanted to tell her far in advance so that she can find another bridesmaid. Just looking for some advice- did I do the right thing?