I hate still being in love with him...

I really love my son's dad, it's been some time since we've split. I guess I'm having the hardest time realizing we won't ever be together again. I wanted my little family to stick together, I thought he'd grow up and do right by us. He never did though so I let him go. Sucks when the person you want the most isn't good for you.. Now he's out being everything I would have liked for him to be for his new girlfriend.

Deep down I fear that I won't find love again. I hear all these stories of children being hurt by the new "dads" & it kind of scares me. I kind of thought we were meant to be he even says I'm the only girl he's ever loved so much. Just don't understand who goes to these lengths to break someone's heart. Especially after doing so much for him, I allowed him in my home, financially supported him in many aspects... I gave too much of myself made shit too easy for him, so it was a breeze for him when I let him go

We made a baby way too quickly before really getting to enjoy eachother so I guess he's enjoying his time not being a dad with a new girl.