So originally I was just going to be working two part time jobs with 4-5 HR shifts. I was supposedly going to be able to bring my 6 month old to the day job and then his dad would take him on the nights I worked. I've been having trouble pumping lately (I stopped having to pump/supplement and now it feels like the pump is ripping my skin off no matter how I position, how full my breast are, etc.) so I was thinking that only working 4 hrs wouldn't hurt me to bad since he often goes 3-4 hrs between feedings.

BUT now the day shift job has become a 40 hr a week desk job and I'll have to put him into a daycare... I usually take anxiety meds but have been off of them since getting pregnant and breastfeeding and my issue here is that I am severely depressed and anxious about having to formula feed him even though I shouldn't be 😭😭😭 I struggled so hard for his first three weeks to get him eating and to get my milk in (terrible nursing staff and bad decisions made by them after birth caused me to not see my son until 5 HOURS after my csection so milk didn't come in right away) and now he's barely six months and I'm going to have to stop.

I have a bit of breast milk saved in the freezer but it's maybe only enough for a couple weeks... I had to stop with my middle son after 9 months because I had to go back on my medicine but I am having such a hard time dealing with this even though I know it's not a huge deal. I know that he got 6 full months and I have to work because I need the money but I hate it so much.

Sorry for this stupid post, and that it probably doesn't make much sense, but no one in my family understands and their dad isn't interested. My sister is still breastfeeding her almost 2 yr old and my mom makes comments to me about how my son being bottle feed when we go on vacation will be so much easier... blah, blah, blah but she would NEVER say shit like that to my sister 😒 I know stuff like that shouldn't bother me but it does and I just needed to vent!