How much longer!!! **vent** I need emotional support :(


I’m 38w4d today. 4 days I went to the hospital because I was suddenly getting really strong contractions that were mostly not time-able for about 2 hours. I hadn’t really had any contractions since then. The day before I went to the hospital, I went to my appt and I was at 0cm. That next day I was 1 cm and the contractions slowed down so they sent me home. Next day I was having contractions off and on, but nothing that took my breath away. I did have a small amount of bloody mucous. Yesterday I thought for sure this is it. My contractions were time-able, and very frequent lasting 40 seconds and coming every 3 minutes. Walking around made the contractions come on stronger so I spent a lot of time walking. This went on for an hour and the contractions starting stronger and closer so I went to the hospital and paced the hallways. I was up to almost 2cm and then the contractions slowed down to every 5 minutes. They were still extremely painful so they gave me a morphine shot before I left. Then I passed out for the rest of the night.

I don’t know if it’s all the physical trauma or what but now it’s pretty hard to walk. I just wanna know what the heck is going on! Why is my body playing tricks on me? How much longer until this is over? I can’t go back to work because there’s no way I can drive if I start having contractions again. I don’t know what to do with myself. I’m just tired of being disappointed and wasting everyone’s time, including my own.