Am I crazy or just need to calm down

I’m a 26 year old virgin and have been dating my bf for 6 months now. He has been totally okay with waiting and he said that he would let me take the lead when it comes to sex. We have mostly been waiting because I wasn’t on birth control. I am now and I asked him to get tested before we have sex.

He wasn’t happy when I asked him to but after explaining to him that since he has had multiple partners and he is pretty sure his ex cheated that it would be a smart idea to get tested. Even if he swears up and down that he doesn’t have anything, you just don’t know until you get tested.

Now I am ready to have sex but now he wants to wait. And I just don’t understand why? When I ask him he just kind brushed it off and said no real reason. He also has said because he hasn’t been tested yet? Which I’ve responded screw the test and let’s go. But still nothing. From our mutual friend I found out that he is afraid of hurting me.

When I asked him more he said that he is just not ready for the emotional part of it because for girls it’s so much different the first time.

Note I’ve also been pmsing this week so that is factoring in but all I can think is that there is something wrong with me and that he doesn’t want me in that way. (Also little background info: my mother told me I was going to end up alone and no one was ever going to love me. This is my first serious relationship so that’s all coming in to play too) he knows my history.

We do a lot of dry humping and some grinding. He loves doggy style but with clothes on that does nothing for me. Like he doesn’t even play with my boobs or anything. So I get nothing and he gets off every time.

So to sum up a long post: am I crazy for being upset that he doesn’t want to have sex yet/ upset that he hasn’t gotten tested? Or am I just getting sexually frustrated? Or maybe I just need to chill and things will happen when they happen. Thanks ladies for any insight you may have!