Does anyone else have a panic attack thinking about giving birth?


Ok so I’ve been TTC for 3 years with recurring misscariages. So I am ecstatic that I am currently 9.5 weeks pregnant and everything looks and sounds strong and healthy. However. Now that I am pregnant I keep thinking about the delivery and having bad anxiety. My first child was premature and almost didn’t make it. She spent some time in the NICU. Then my second child almost didn’t make it and I almost didn’t make it threw the delivery either. I hemorrhaged and he had the unbiblical cord around his neck which was really bad. He did make it and needed a lot of physical therapy. Anyways. I’m trying to think positive and not let scary thoughts into my head. Sometimes it’s hard. I have not talked to anyone about this at all. I’m ashamed of these thoughts and feelings and don’t want anyone to know I’m having them or that I’m scared. On here is ok because I feel a lot of people can relate. And if people on here think bad about me on this, I don’t care because I don’t know anyone personally. Anyways. Just looking for people that can relate so I don’t feel so down on myself or so all alone