help ladies

So my husband wants to do anal sex and I'm nervous about it. every other time we tried it was just too painful and we came up with an ultimatum and I agreed to do it. my question for you ladies is what would I do to prepare myself and have it hurt less. or what are some things that will help me numb the area a bit. I've been also wanting to do this for some time and o have jist been too scared. also can I have your first then experience with this it might help me know what to expect