Sad...

So me and my ex NEVER stopped fw each other anyways in all this he dates my friend (we’ll old friend now) but anyways I still fw him don’t care because she shouldn’t of done that if she knew what we had going on but long story short now I just feel like I can’t do it anymore😩like I can’t do this sharing shit. He’s texted me saying I act like I don’t fw him . It’s not that I don’t fw him it’s just I can’t do this without catching feelings again and I don’t want him to know that so I just told him I do but I didn’t say all the real reason. I just want to know what to do like I like being with him it’s just now the shit is bothering me I feel like I’m just not knowing my worth which I thought I did and it’s really making me down being that I have no one to talk to because I feel like people will judge me so I don’t tell how I really feel.... I really need someone to talk to😪