Ok so it’s been 16 years since I had my twins and I’ll be 40 b4 this lil one gets here. I’m 10 weeks today and my first dr appointment is in the morning at 9am. I have been wanting this day to get here till last week. Now I want the e-break!! I don’t understand why the fuck I’m so scared?!?!? I’m crying right now and my anxiety is 💯. My boyfriend told me yesterday, very lovingly, that I’m starting to show just a little. We both wanted our baby and are excited. Why am I scared of the doctor appointment?? I’m scared something is wrong, that I’m too old to have a healthy baby, that I haven’t taken well enough care of us, and that I maybe pregnant with twins again. I know 2 is double the love, it’s just a lot.

Someone please talk to me... bf is asleep and I don’t think he’d understand. I’ve kept most of the hormonal crazies to myself.