So ive been dating this guy for over two years. Most of our relationship has been long distance because I went to college after a little less than six months of dating. He is my first real relationship. Six months ago or so he joined the army and went to basic training. I visited for graduation and started to get a bad feeling. ive considered on and off breaking up with him foe the last two months.

The feeling keeps getting stronger...and it’s not a fear of long distance...he’s National guard and his base is in my college town so I’d be able to see him a lot now. But I think the distance during basic let me get detached from the excited “first relationship” feelings and I’m left with a bf I care deeply for, but I’m questioning whether I could marry because of personality/moral differences.

I haven’t decided whether or not we should break up...but I’m faced with a problem if I decide to do so.

If I break up with him now, it would have to be over the phone and it seems a little indecent to do that. Also I’m kind of hanging on to the feeling that maybe if I physically am with him again I’ll rethink the break up.

However if I break up with him in person after he gets back it also seems cruel because we only have like 5 days before I go to school and I don’t want to blindside right after he gets home. Also my birthday happens right before he gets back so i don’t want him to spend money on a gift just to be broken up with.

The third option would be to wait even longer until he visits me at school. It would provide me more time to think about it, but I’m worried it’s too much time.

Any advice would be appreciated 😭