BFP / Scared to death

I have always been hoping to get to see those two lines on a test. I was sick of seeing that one line appearing all the time. I used to imagine my reaction the moment I get to see the second line and it was like I would be the happiest person on earth. I would shed tears out of happiness and I would run to my husband to share the good news with him. However, non of this happened the moment I saw a second line appearing. The timing was completely crazy. I took a test three days after my period was late. it showed a very faint positive. I was very happy and decided to wait a bit to get a darker line. The following day I got what seemed like a period. the disappointment was huge. I spent the whole day crying. After 6 days it stopped and I spent a whole day with normal white discharge. After that I started spotting. today is my third day. when I told mum she asked me to retest again. To my surprise a second line showed up it was very clear to see. When I saw it, I didn't react as I imagined I would, but I got missed feelings of fear and disappointment. I don't know what to think anymore. I am so confused!!!!!!!!!