Am I in the wrong for this?

Question

So I’m a stay at home mom, I can’t drive due to Epilepsy, I pretty much stay in the house all week with my son. I don’t know anyone around where we live because we just moved here. I literally feel like I’m going crazy because I never leave.. my fiancé thinks I’m in the wrong for wanting him to come home straight after work and hangout with us on the weekends because I don’t think it’s fair that I never get to do anything and All I do all day is sit around and wait for him to get home. I would love to get a job, but we’re honestly saving more money not paying for a babysitter plus I wouldn’t have a ride. We don’t even know anyone around here who could babysit for us. He thinks im naggy for wanting him to stay in with me but I honestly think his job is a luxury because as much as I love my son, I would kill to go back to work. It drives me crazy being home all day, and not having anyone to talk to. My son is only 1 and can’t talk yet. We live in the country, the closest thing to us is a dollar General store 3 miles away. It’s honestly getting so old that he can’t see it from my point of view. Its becoming an everyday type of fight now. He’s been having work friends over on weekends since “I won’t let him do anything outside the house” and they just eat all our food, get drunk, and work on cars well I take care of our son and do the same shit I’ve been doing. I feel like he thinks just because he makes the money, and can just be in control of everything. I’m at my breaking point and am about to say fuck it and leave and he’s not understanding at all where I’m coming from.

Answer

I think you both deserve time to spend with friends/coworkers. You can’t force someone to spend all of their free time with you, and it’s healthy that he has friends. But you deserve that too. My husband and I work together to make sure we each take over when the other one has their time and if he has friends over the house I make sure to entertain our daughter. Even if it’s a job 1-2 days a week for a few hours, you could schedule your shifts so he can drive you. As a compromise, support him spending time outside the home.

Answer

I'm so sorry you are going through this. the main issue is that there is a huge imbalance in how both of you see your ideal lives as being , and how things are. he clearly sees that he deserves his down time with friends and since you have no friends (through no fault of your own) , you depend on him for every social interaction. I would recommend trying to find balance - 2 nights a week he can do his thing with his friends. no more. and u will not nag one bit. and , you will get an evening job/activity , something you can engage in when he returns home from work, for 2 nights a week also. even if all u do is enrol and go to a gym class with other mothers in your area for 2 nights. those 2 nights, your  husband stays home, and cares for your son. So between his 2 nights and your 2 nights, it leaves 3 nights a week for family time for 3 of u. Can you consider this set up? a gym class/a hobby class /an evening job. something to get you out. he could even drive you there and back or use public transport.  all the best.

Answer

try and get him to take you out at weekends plan activities to do as a family and tell him you need time away from the house just ad much as he does but you want to do things as a family and due to you not being able to drive you rely on him and you need him to help you out and try and understand where your coming from

Answer

I know exactly how you feel. SAHM and I currently don’t drive. I’m alone with my 13 month old & my fiancé works 12 hour shifts alllll the time. 
I get frustrated being so alone all the time and he gets frustrated that I don’t always want his friend to come over on his off days. 
But, we find balance. There are weeks where his off days are family days and there are weeks where his off days he hangs with his friend. 
You guys have to sit down and really talk about it. They doesn’t understand the isolation we feel because they have adult interaction all week. My fiancé has finally understood how I feel and We’ve found a balance that works for us. 
Not letting him see his friends isn’t okay but either is always having his friends over and never acknowledging you and your guys child. 
Try to talk to him & find what works for you! Good luck mama. I know how you feel.

Answer

im stay at home mom and the feeling u so are super close to mine i feel like all day im waiting for him to come home but we differ cuz the min hes home i want go out with our friends or go somewhere just to get the hell outta the house. but my hubby works hard in the sun 10hrs a day and the last thing he wants to do after work is go anywhere. so our fights are opposite but start from the same feeling

Answer

I understand, I’m an epileptic as well. I guess all I can say is try to talk to him again. Make him understand some how, otherwise there isn’t anything else you can do.

Am I in the wrong for this?

Let's Glow!

The Top Baby Tracker App: Embrace New Beginnings with Tender Care

The Top Fertility Tracker App: Your Path to Achieving Pregnancy

The Top Pregnancy App: Nurturing Your Journey to Motherhood

The Top Period Tracker for Empowering Your Menstrual Health Journey