Dear mom friend,

You have changed in the past few years. In many ways I know it’s because you are a mom now and must put your children before all else. That is something I totally understand. However, the high horse you now ride on is disgusting. You treat everyone of your friends who do not have children like you are above them. You act like you are so much more advanced than us and that we should feel humbled you even still deal with us. You say you’ve lost friends because we are all in different places but you lost yourself. I have many mom friends who are still them but with an extra bonus a little nephew/niece to love. You however are not you but will not accept any blame. You parade around like you have it all right. That you are the IT mom. Yet you get flustered when anyone says they won’t parent a certain way when they have kids. You get pissy if said thing is something you do as a mom. No one said you’re doing it wrong. Just because someone doesn’t want to be just like you doesn’t mean it’s an attack. It just means that we don’t like certain things.

Am I perfect ? Hell no.

But at least I can state my faults. At least I can admit I don’t like people and sometimes kids just fucking suck ( and yes other moms actually can think kids suck. It’s not just us women without kids who “just don’t understand yet”) I get mean and I’m easily irritated.

I remember wanting to be like you when we were young. You were so pretty and had a great body and all the boys paid attention to you. I never actually told you that but you knew. I know you knew because you walked around stating that to anyone who knew both of us. You bragged about it. I honestly think that’s you’re problem with me now. I no longer look up to you or want to be you. I’ve become my own person and deep down that’s what hurts you about me.

I think you only hold on because I want a child and it will be something that hopefully happens soon. I swear it’s just to see me fail or not appear as great as you are. Or so I’ll come running saying how you are so right. Or if I’m an excellent mom it’s so you can somehow make it about how you are “proud” but only because you act like you’re the reason I’ve done well.

I took a different path but we are winding up in the same place. And soon you won’t have this “leg up” on me.

I still love you and our friendship we used to have and in some ways I’m jealous of your life but not in the ways you think. Lately I have so much built up things I need to say to you but I just cant. Maybe one day this will all be different. Maybe me being a mom myself will make you see me differently. I really doubt it though.

Maybe I’m crazy. Maybe my brain over thinks everything you say or do so I think you truly think less of me or down on me. I truly don’t know and I feel like even if I said all of this it’d never be a truly honest conversation. You’d never let those thoughts out if they were true because that ruins your perfectly nice and caring image.