Would you leave over lack of sex?

Question

husband and I have a pretty significant age gap. we have a 1.5 year old and I'm 34 weeks with baby #2. Married almost a year. We love each other, we're best friends. He has been having trouble getting it up. We have gone through a 14 month dry spell. idk how I made it through that. Tonight he finally tried viagra and so far, it's not working. I think fatigue has a lot to do with it. I have always had a nigh sex drive. He could go the rest of his life without it. Part of me just wants to bang someone on the side. I'm a total loss on what to do.

Answer

Please yourself?? I wouldn’t leave someone over lack of sex, especially if you’re married and everything else is good. It’s not his fault and he seems to be trying to figure it out so I’d stick with him until he does.

Answer

I did....
So I just got out of a sexless relationship about nine months ago. I was with my SO for ten years. While we didn’t have children we shared everything else. Houses animals vehicles etc. By the time it ended it had been 2.5 years since the last time he had ever touched me. And the time before was a year earlier. 
Being in this relationship was incredibly emotionally draining for me. I was suffering from depression and low self esteem. I cried all the time. We would fight about the lack of intimacy constantly. I knew this was something he needs to see a doctor about but he just kept avoiding it.
Probably about three or four moths before we broke up he was diagnosed with severely low testosterone. Which is why he had no interest in sex. The doctor put him on testosterone injections and gave him Cialis. He still did not wish to have sex with me. And he started being very cold and uncaring to me. So I told him he needed to stop being such an ass or I was leaving. And he basically said he wasn’t going to do this anymore. 
I was devastated. I wasn’t sure how I would survive being single and dating again. I found some flirty text he sent to another girl and that was it. Fuck him I wasn’t giving him anymore if my tears. 
I moved out of our house and to a different city. Found myself an amazing man who treats me well and we fuck ALL THE TIME!!! I actually have energy to go to the gym and run all the time. I’m starting to feel better about my body. And I’m happy. Looking back I stayed in that relationship far longer than I should have. But being scared of change can keep you somewhere you don’t want to be. 
I’m not saying you should leave. Just telling my story. And that I can totally sympathize with not getting any from the person who says they love you. I’ve been there. It’s tough. In the end you need to do what you think is best for you and your family. Good luck!

Answer

Would your husband maybe be up for using sex toys on you?  Keep the connection there between the two of you.  Part of being married is fulfilling some of those physical needs for our spouse.  It is difficult for us to understand how a man can just say, I have no interest.  For us if we are not in the mood, guess what, we physically CAN still have sex. Men cant. Thats a lot of pressyre for them. Feeling pressured to perform can kill it. I know because my husband and I have had some issues lately with this exact thing.  He has no idea why is has no interest, it just isnt there.  However, he's trying.  He will attempt it and if he can't keep it up he makes sure I am taken care of. This is a recent development, him doing that. Before it was, "well that sucks, we will try again next time."   I was getting depressed and began resenting him. He hadnt told me about his lack of interest and I didnt tell him I felt neglected. We had a talk and it changed everything. I hope you guys can find a solution that works for both of you. Maybe try asking him though to make sure you're taken care of.

Answer

My sister goes / went through this. Her husband just had no interest in sex. He lives her to pieces but just couldn’t or wouldn’t want anything to do with sex. He went in some medications to help. It was depression and a thyroid problem. Also testosterone supplements help. If he is willing to try different things to fix the problem then by all means support him. If he just wants to give it up for good, I would say maybe time to move on. Sex is such an important part of a relationship and not just the physical satisfaction but the intimacy is what can keep a relationship alive.

Answer

I can understand how frustrating that is! That said, if this is only his first night trying viagra, then definitely give it some time to see if things change. Sometimes it takes time for medications to actually start working. If after a few weeks the viagra doesn’t seem to be working, then have him talk to his doctor about trying a different brand of ED medication, viagra isn’t the only one (Cialis is another one). U also mentioned fatigue being a possible reason as well, if the fatigue has been going on awhile & hasn’t gotten better with good rest, less stress, etc, then he should definitely talk to his doctor about that too, as it could be due to a medical condition or hormone imbalance. So, while sexual incompatibility IS a real thing & can break a relationship or marriage, it’s obvious that ur husband is currently trying to work on making things better. Therefore, I wouldn’t suggest a divorce at this point. U guys could even try seeing a marriage counselor or sex therapist. Either way, just give him more time to try & improve things. Good luck!!

Answer

Did you forget about the part that says for better or for worse? Yikes! Poor guy is having penis trouble and his old lady wants to get it on the side. Find a way to work through it.... you are 34 weeks pregnant, that could have something to do with it! Before people get all bent thinking I’m a sexist guy, I’m a woman... me and my SO have had two babies together. While he never had an issue with erections, his sexual appetite did wane later in pregnancy. It’s just not very sexy to some guys, and creepily sexy to others. And if I’m being honest, if I WAS a dude.... it night make me have a hard time getting it up. The pregnancy is SUPER visible at that point, and hard to get past. As a woman my hormones were totally feeling it, but mentally I just didn’t feel “sex bomb”. I was super looking forward to not-pregnant sex, having my familiar body back, not feeling odd pains, having my old flexibility and being capable of positions that pregnancy took from me... not to mention how he treated me like I was made of glass. Look at this lull as temporary, and take care of yourself if you need to. Don’t step out on him and treat him like you married him for his penis. Would it be okay with you for him to do that when you CANT have sex after delivery?

Answer

I mean, I wouldn’t leave if it sounds like you have a lot going for you in the relationship, but it does sound like you need to explore other avenues for stimulation.

Answer

The whole point of marriage is that you stick together through the really hard stuff “for better or for worse, in sickness and health” if you leave when it gets “worse” (excluding abuse of course) what’s the point of getting married? It’s no different then dating then 🤔 You made vows to each other. Im sure it’s hard on you, but Don’t give up! If you both keep honestly trying you can’t loose. Try maybe seeing a sex or marriage therapist if you haven’t already

Answer

No, i wouldn't leave my husband just because of our sex issues.

Would you leave over lack of sex?

Let’s Glow

Glow is here for you on your path to pregnancy

25+ million

4.8 stars

20+

Getting Pregnant

Pregnancy

1st Year (Baby & You)

Baby Products