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The other comments have great suggestions. You could also tell him you want a super neutral party to marry you so no one feels left out without having something that special as a job. And I know it can be so frustrating, sometimes my mom is so nosy. But I have to remind myself that she cares. Yours sounds a little more than that. So maybe you and your man can come up with a job to give her that occupied her time and makes her feel involved so she might lay off some other things. Even if it’s something silly or random. It might make her feel special and needed, which may be all she’s after.
in-law advice needed
Hi ladies. So a bit of background information before my question. Ever since my fiancè and I got engaged, my future in-laws have been ver nosey in our wedding planning process, whereas my parents have been very hands-off unless we ask for an opinion.
My to be mother-in-law is the biggest problem. She seems to think the wedding is all about her, not us. She literally created a list of things she wanted OUR WEDDING to have, and then got mad when we told her no. At this point, all of her ideas make my fiancè and I feel like we'd be guests at our own wedding. Which is stupid, because the day is about us and our commitment to one another.
Anyway, my fiancé recently brought up to me that he wants his mom to marry us. She was training to be a pastor but was never actually ordained (? ... sorry, I'm Catholic 😬). We agreed to get married in the Lutheran Church so, no, that's not my issue with this. It's more so the fact that she has tried to manipulate our plans so many times without having an "in" so to speak, and I think if she's our minister that will give it to her. I'm honestly surprisedhe wants this after all the shit that's happened (there's soooo much more but I attempted to keep this short).
How do I tell him that without offending him/calling his mom a manipulative b**** who thinks our wedding is all about her??? (Obvi I know not to say that last bit but it is how I'm feeling). Thanks in advance!
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We had a lot of family members offer their services for our wedding (uncle is a DJ, other uncle owns a hair salon, aunt is a photographer, brother in law is a chef, etc.). While this would have kept costs down SO much, we really felt like we wanted everyone to enjoy the wedding. If they were working, they wouldn’t be able to do that. I’d tell him that if she were to be “working” as the pastor, she would be missing out on a lot of other things, such as walking down the aisle, getting ready in the morning with everyone, etc. Maybe instead have her be the one to say the blessing before dinner at the reception.
Ka
Great idea! Thank you!
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