I am aware that this decision should be solely up to me and I can’t base it on what anyone else thinks, but I feel so burdened by the weight of everything and I would like to know what others would do if they were in my situation. Sorry in advance for the long read.

I had a hormonal IUD (Skyla) since January 2017. My period was a few days late this month, so I took a pregnancy test on Saturday thinking I was just being paranoid. It was positive. I took another just to be sure and that one was also positive. With IUD’s there is a high risk for ectopic pregnancy and miscarriage. I had a doctor’s appointment on Tuesday and they could not yet tell if the pregnancy is ectopic or not, so I am having blood work done over the next few days and another ultrasound next week. Hopefully by then I will know.

If it is NOT ectopic, then I am faced with the choice of whether I will keep this baby or terminate the pregnancy. I am currently a graduate student going into my second year, the baby would be due in the middle of the spring semester (I don’t graduate until December 2019). So I would need to take time off school to have the baby and maybe come back to school at a later time. I am obviously not in a good place financially to raise a baby, but I have the support of my parents (if I move back home) and I know money can always be figured out even if it is tough. The biggest issue for me though is I have only known the father for less than two months. I was in a long term relationship when I first got the IUD but recently ended that relationship and jumped into this new one. This new man is very supportive and excited to start a family but I just don’t know him well enough to make a decision about “forever” yet and I would not want to be a single mom.

I am pro-choice but always told myself that I don’t believe in abortion for myself personally. I see life as a gift and I know I could give the baby a good life and love it fully. I know the fetus is just a cluster of cells at the moment and I feel silly for being attached to it but I am. I’ve always wanted kids but just thought it would come at a time in my life where I was actually prepared and had planned for it. Obviously I was actively trying to avoid thid situation with the IUD, so I know I shouldn’t feel guilty but I am just so emotional about the whole thing.

What would you do? Has anyone been in a similar situation? What is your advice? Any and everything is welcome except for judgment and hate please xx