It's long I'm sorry.

She came over with my MIL right after we told them I was pregnant. I am 8 weeks. She kept calling my breasts pendulous, I eventually said that I didn't think they were to which she responded "they are definitely not as perky as they used to be....." She also told me I had a pooch.

I didn't say anything at the time but felt pretty bad. I responded the next day with this text

me

During the next year my body will undergo many changes that will be difficult for me both physically and emotionally.

After you left last night I felt shitty for the very first time about the changes in my body.

I spent a lot of time thinking about the comments you made and how they made me feel, wondering if I was just being overly sensitive. The conclusion I came to was that I may indeed be overly sensitive right now but I believe the comments were inherently unkind and would make most women feel insecure. Telling any women her breasts are pendulous (repeatedly) and that she has a pooch is unkind and inappropriate and I can't come up with beneficial reason to make these comments.

I would ask that you refrain from making further comments about my changing body.

her response :

I would definitely put that in the category of overreacting. I would kill for breasts that were full enough for gravity to affect them in such a pleasing manner that they be described as "pendulous". It's not a negative term. I'm sorry that you took it that way. And I'm sorry that you think I'm that viscious that I would say anything to hurt you, let alone do so repeatedly. I view all of the changes a woman's body undergoes in pregnancy with wonder, and it's highly likely I will never be able to experience it first hand. I apologise for attempting to share it with you, since you are carryg the first child to be born in my lifetime that is biologically related to anyone in my immediate family.

And thank you for addressing this in the most insensitive way you possibly could have. I won't comment on your pregnancy again or make the mistake of lowering my guard around at all. Thank you for the reminder that we are not friends anymore, but merely stuck with each other because you married into my family.

Added

text message was medium of choice as we have had verbal disagreements before where she has ... argued fiercely that I said things which I never did. This way there can be no confusion. Well less confusion maybe? As she claims that I think she is vicious... I like being able to reference exactly what I said and know for sure i never said that.

But I can understand if she would have preferred I called