Should I be upset? Am I in the wrong?

Question

So my boyfriend and I recently got a job at Popeyes. Things are going okay, it’s my first job since I tried to commit suicide, I have social anxiety but I am doing much better lately. I do well at work, I’ve got everything down pat, however when a lot of people come in I get shakey and one day is was working and I got overwhelmed I went on break and did not come back. I felt extremely guilty I Just felt like I couldn’t handle the pressure. My boss called me and I just explained a customer made me upset, I got my job back and was doing great. However, tonight I found out that my boyfriend previously told my co workers that I have social anxiety without my permission and without asking me first. I had no idea he told them, and he’s not even sorry. This really hurt my feelings and I feel like he told something that was truly personal, that I don’t let a lot of people know.

Accepted Answer

He’s coming off as rude but I sort of understand where he’s coming from.. if things like this are going to affect your work then at the very least the people working with you everyday should know.. I’m sure it helps them to understand why you left and didn’t come back

Answer

I don’t think you’re in the wrong. I understand why you’d be upset. But I don’t think he’s in the wrong either. I’m sure you’re possibly feeling a little embarrassed and insecure? Which is fine. But if you left and didn’t come back, he might have felt a little inclined to divulge that as well. They associate you with him and so it’s only natural that they would ask. And if he felt like they’d be understanding, I can see why he’d let them know. It could actually help you out if everyone is aware. That way if you’re struggling they can make an adjustment so you don’t get overwhelmed again and leave work.

Answer

I don’t think anyones in the wrong. You can feel upset but he didn’t do it to be malicious. Your coworkers were probably asking why you walked out or even talking shit so he explained your situation. You need to find better ways to handle that anxiety though. Speak with your manager about taking a 3min break to cool off, bc walking out will only be forgiven so many times

Answer

I personally wouldn't care. I probably would eventually tell them anyway because I wouldn't want them thinking "wth is wrong with this girl". I've personally had co-workers talking shit behind my back for something simular and when I told them the truth they understood and stopped. So I wouldn't have cared but that's just me.

Answer

His heart seemed like it was in a good place and I feel like he genuinely has your back. I understand why you would be upset. When your not ready to share information and it gets out it can be uncomfortable. But sometimes even if you want to tell people what's going on it can be hard and it helps to have someone who will stand up for you and stop those people from making up their own stories/rumors. Making sure they know your story and the truth is important. Now that he did the first one just tell him you want to be the one to tell people the next time and all the times following.❤❤

Answer

I had a similar issue with my boyfriend (didn’t start that way when I started working there). I have a chest and heart condition where I’m not supposed to lift a lot, however when I applied for the job (at a gas station) i knew I might occasionally have to lift trash. One night before we were dating I had a flare up and kinda explained what happened, when started dating I went into more depth. He had went to our boss and told him I wasn’t allowed to lift anything. At first I was upset with him because it is personal, I don’t tell everyone cause I don’t want pity,.. but i understood he was looking out for my best interest

Answer

Wow. I am the same exact way. I have horrible social anxiety. when i wasnt a stay at home mom they put me on register and messed up someones order and they got mad at me and I just started having an anxiety attack ended up crying and going to the back room. I openly told everyone and was embarrassed but I think it's good for them to know because they'd help out when I was feeling overwhelmed (and didn't put me back on register). I have to start working again very soon and it's freaking me out but I'm going to a psychiatrist first to see if I can get on meds that helps me.

Answer

I understand why you’re upset. Social anxiety is a difficult and very personal issue. So you were already having a rough time but it’s now worse because your coworkers know about it. While he shouldn’t have told anyone, it seems like he did it to help you out rather than to be malicious. As in to provide an explanation for why you didn’t come back to work. I think you need to sit down with him and discuss the issue because in my experience people that don’t have anxiety issues have very little understanding of it.

Answer

I feel he could have explained a bit with the manager what was going on as I have had the same thing happen to me...  but it should have been a confidential conversation. yes you have every right to be upset since he told everyone.

Answer

I would be upset too so you’re not wrong, I bet he wouldn’t like if you told everyone about something personal that only a few poeple know about him and the fact that he isn’t even sorry is sad

Should I be upset? Am I in the wrong?

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