*** pleaseeee no judgement, I’m already do that myself****

So I’m 11 weeks and I’m getting an abortion in 2 days. Ive never really been against them, I feel it’s a women’s choice but I always told myself “I’d never do that”... turns out, I found myself already with a 1 year old, not financially stable, definitely not mentally or emotionally stable, and I know I wouldn’t be able to give this baby the life he or she deserves. We’re struggling enough with our daughter. She has Down syndrome and we wanted to wait before having another. My heart is torn by the decision but I cannot bring another baby in this world while we are already struggling so much financially and mentally. It wouldn’t be right or fair.

Anyways...

do I have to call my OB dr and tell them I’m getting an abortion or do I just call and cancel my next appointment with them?

Also, any advice on how to not hate myself for this?