Need to know:

MIL is 45

SO 27 and ME 25

Me and SO have been together almost 7 years.

Hi all. So I've been lurking here for a while and this is my first time posting. We just started trying this year with no luck yet.

I just found out last night that my mother in law is pregnant..almost 20 weeks already too. She has a lot of health issues due to being overweight and she didn't know she was pregnant.

I'm crushed. 😢 I know my feelings are irrational but I can't help feeling jealous, angry and overwhelmed. I don't know what to do.

I'm scared to get pregnant now at the same time as her, and I'm currently in my TWW too.

Also she's having a boy and now I'm worried she's gonna use the boy name that we've had picked out for years. (Name is a J name, all her kids are J names)

I'm really struggling to hold it together here..

This will be her 6th kid. The last 3 were "accidents". I feel awfully bitter and I can't help it. 😢

I told my SO it's just not fair. How did we go almost 7 years without 1 scare but our parents don't seem to know what birth control is.. My 42 yr old mom just had an "accidental" new baby 3 years ago too.

I just feel so angry.

The really messed up part is that at the beginning of the year MIL said to me, " You guys better have a baby soon or I'm gonna have to have another one..." She also said a couple months ago when my aunt had a baby, "Oh everyone around you is having babies, but not you! HAHA"

Man I feel so broken after getting all that out..😢

Thanks for reading and letting me vent, and if you have any advice on how to curb my emotions around her, I'd be happy to hear them.