Grieving and need to write down my feelings
I had my D&C this morning. I went to my 10 week check up and found that my baby stopped growing at 7 w 5 d. I had seen my baby at 7 w with a strong heart beat.
Thankfully I only had to wait one day from when we got the news to have the procedure.
My procedure was fine physically, I have a lot of pain tolerance, I'm just taking Advil and only lightly bleeding and sore so far. My doctor, anesthesiologist and nurses were great.
Emotionally I have to say it's very difficult and my husband and I are leaning in each other.
My sister in law is a nurse and she took me to the procedure and here for support too.
I'm so sad to lose my baby and it hurts. I'm waiting in the chromosomal testing to see what happened and I'm requesting to know the gender too for closure.
I plan on creating a memory box with my ultrasound photo, belly shots, etc. I'm also getting a tattoo (which was planned and now going to be tweaked a little).
I tell myself to be strong and open with my feelings, sometimes it's difficult.
I feel lost and have moments of despair but am determined to have faith and strength but know it's ok to melt into my husband's arms and cry or talk to my mom or best friends when I feel like I'm spiraling down.
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