God someone help me! :( baby ultrasound tomorrow and I'm so scared!!!

I am going nuts! I'm around 8-10 wks. I was having pregnancy symptoms and all but now I just gag still, but there's no headaches, hardly much nausea. I have been under so much stress and I'm going to be a single mother. I lost my mom June 10 and tomorrow I have my first ultrasound. I'm so scared they won't find a heartbeat. I was in renal failure last month and dehydrated. I've just been so stressed and the hours are ticking by. I don't want my baby's daddy to be there tomorrow because so many reasons and one being he told me the other night that he wished circumstances were different and I wasn't pregnant. I'm terrified there's not gonna be a heartbeat. I want my ex's mom to go but it will be a big fight cause I'll say I don't want him to go and she''ll go but she''ll be kinda hurt but understanding. She knows how he is and what he's done to me. I can't let this baby go through that. If it has survived. I'm so scared I've lost the baby. :'(